I’m doing the thankful thing again this year. Last year I just posted to facebook. I don’t think I made it more than 10 days out of the month and I really regret it. For one, I can’t go back and look at them. And then, I can’t write a back story to them.
So this time I’m blogging them. I may not have time to write much about them but I know I can at least look back over them next year. Also, I’ve decided to try and not just be thankful for the obvious. I want to rethink the negative and see the beauty in what aggravates and challenges me. I want to complain less and value more. Take the time to pick apart and see the silver lining in every grey cloud… You get the idea, right?
So here I go.
I am thankful for the hard questions my children ask, because it means they’re not afraid to ask us anything. And when we don’t have an answer, they’re learning that it’s ok to not always know the answers no matter who you are.
My sweet Selah. She can ask some very direct questions that would make any adult squirm. Especially when she looks up at you with big brown eyes full of innocent indignation, angered at the calamity of the world around her. We have taught our children that they can ask us ANYTHING. We mean it, for realz, and to support it we practice our poker face on regular basis. Not to mention prayers for lightning-speed-guidance of our responses and control of any knee-jerk reactions. We desperately want our children to escape our own issues as well as possible, but it’s hard to look past them.
Recently this billboard popped up a few blocks from our house. The location is actually quite brilliant. It’s right above a strip club that has changed hands several times and has a nasty reputation. So placing an advertisement to target Child Sex Trafficking is quite appropriate.
Seeing it for the first time brought on some pretty serious questions for Selah. Knowing sex as a really cool thing that married people get to do, she was deeply troubled and couldn’t sleep over it. What I love is that she asked Travis first, proving that she doesn’t feel awkward or ashamed to talk to her Papi.
Why would someone go to jail for sex?
Isn’t it a gift from God?
How does somebody buy it?
Why does it say child on it?
Children can’t have sex and get pregnant, can they?
Ouch. Tough topic for an 8 year old. But I believe in Truth. So that is what we give them when they ask. Gently and cautiously, but Truth it is. So in her father’s arms, my baby got some cautious answers. Now my daughter now knows a bit about these things and that makes me sad. She knows that we have no idea how to stop it, or how to save the children involved. Most of all she knows that we’re not perfect and that we will try to tell her everything we can and not hide things from her. That includes our pain and fears and insecurities. Because Mommies and Daddies are human. We don’t know it all and we can’t save the world. Yet we love our babies fiercely and truly in all that we do. And we have to look beyond our own family in our prayers and in our acts of service and giving. Kids should know that. All of it.
So I leave you with this and ask you to think about it, too. Because I don’t have the answers.
PS: For those who are shocked that we speak so openly about S-E-X with our children, you will find that you have run into one of our major soapboxes of Truthful Parenting. Read my other post HERE.