Houston, We Have A Problem


Here I am, at 6 o’clock in the morning…still dreaming about you…

Song lyrics from yet another cheesy song.  It’s from the mid 80’s.  It’s driving me CRAZY that I can’t remember the rest of the song, title or big haired group.  I just tried to google the lyrics and instead of the answer, I found myself clicking on a nasty porn site.  What jerks to disguise it as something normal. I’m really pretty ticked about it.  Selah was standing right here!!  Thank God I could just shut the laptop and say, over the obnoxious groans, “Honey, go get Popi to wake up.”  Lovely obedient girl…

So, Why am I up and typing again, when I just finished up 4 1/2 hours ago?  Well. I wasn’t sleeping well.  I’m totally achy and sore.  I was still trying to convince myself that it was just a bad cycle, not an indication that The Diva Cup was not so welcome where it was. Then it happened. A about 5:30 I sneezed.  It wasn’t a big sneeze. Nothing close to The Sneeze of 2005 when I peed my pants while I was preggers with Jacob. Now that was embarrassing.  No, this was a modest little sneeze.  Didn’t even wake Travis.  Yes it must have ‘broken the seal’.  I felt a little gush yet was still in that half asleep state where it didn’t register concern. For about five minutes.  Then the nagging something that wasn’t letting me go back to sleep registered.  Um, uh-oh.  Gush is a very, very bad thing. 

So I rolled out of bed and dragged myself to the bathroom.  Yep.  Soaked.  As I reached to Remove the Diva Cup I was shocked at how painful it was.  The walls of my vaja-ja were so sore.  Seriously, ouch.  So out it came.  Dumped it. Rinsed it.  Went to go get a pad.  I think the Diva Cup and I need a break.

I’m really, really sad.   I think this is an amazing product and I wanted to be able to give it a rave review.  It’s not over. I’m going to call Diva Cup today and talk to them.  My suspicion is that I should have the smaller size 1 cup.  I already know I have a small vagina. I’ve (to my sadness) had 3 c-sections, so no stretching by birth.  When I was fitted for a diaphragm I was the smallest size available. That was only a little over a year ago.  So, I’m hoping this is just a size issue. We’ll see.  For now I’m giving it a rest and I’m back to the Glad Rags.

And now both boys are up.  Selah and Travis just left to go on a ‘date’, which simply means breakfast alone at the All Star Cafe.  Teaching my precious girl how a man should treat her early 🙂 More on that later.  For now I’m going on less than 4 hours of sleep.  Lucas woke back up and had to play for another 45 minutes after my  last entry.  I have a tour of the public school with Selah at 8:30(I’ll explain why later), a Koala Mommas meeting to go to at 10:00 and Travis has today off so we intended to do something special with the kids today.May be hard with the rain.  I’m so tired, I actually feel physically ill to the pit of my stomach, so please ignore any extra typos. Not a way to start the day.  I’m going to go make some juice and oatmeal to feed my boys.

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6 Comments

Filed under All Posts, Mellow Shade of Green, Reviews

6 responses to “Houston, We Have A Problem

  1. Kelly

    Oh my! That is too funny. I have considered buying a Diva Cup when my periods resume (thankfully not yet). I was laughing when I saw they came in two different sizes one for before 30 and kids and one for after. What happens after 30 if you haven’t had kids to make your va-jay-jay go south????

  2. Linds

    Oh man. I thought the Diva Cup could end up being a bad thing…but, I hope for your sake you figure it out! It’s all you honey! Be the pioneer for us all 🙂 I’ll stick to my t-time! (I’ll explain later, not on a blog comment!)
    And, we can relish in our lack of sleep together. Although, I sort of wish my lack of sleep was because of me and not because of my sick son, but, none the less, no sleep is no sleep!

  3. Kelly- They say size 2 for anyone over 30 regardless. Not always true as you can see. My poor narrow alley clearly needs a size 1!

    Lindsey- Don’t blame the Diva just yet! I loved the ease of use and I’m still all about giving it another shot next month with a size 1. For now, I’m giving my nether-regions a rest and using my Glad Rags 😉

  4. lilburnout

    Completely off topic but the song I believe your referring too is I need you now by Winger, drove me crazy until I figured it out too ..haha hope it helps !!!

  5. Jessica

    Did you ever order a smaller one or find another solution? I am having the same problem.

  6. No, I didn’t. Someone told me to try the trick of flipping it inside out and it was a much better fit. Hope this helps!!
    ~Talitha~

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